Who Has the Ultimate Say?

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Do you ever feel like there's this gold-standard woman? Not necessarily physically, but even in accomplishments and personality? She's the woman who always plans ahead, gets everything done, has a perfect house, perfect kids, perfect husband, perfect life? And everyone likes her?

I do. I realize that I sometimes try to be her. Every time I make an excuse for why I didn't reply to that email sooner, why I didn't take care of a certain problem long ago, why I don't have control over something, why I made a mistake. Excuses, putting myself down, etc. All so others will believe I am this imaginary person.

But why?

When God created everything, He made us to have a sweet relationship with Him. We spent time with Him in the Garden of Eden, and we needed Him. He gladly gave us His heart along with all we needed, and we gladly received. Then Satan told Eve something was wrong. Satan said God didn't really give her all she needed, but He withheld things she would want, like the knowledge of good and evil. So she did the thing God told her not to do. With that act, she opened the door to knowing what it felt like to betray someone she loves. She suddenly knew the sensation of shame. She and Adam, who also sinned, hid themselves.

God asked them, "Who told you that you were naked?" They had been unclothed the whole time. But it was now, now that they heard someone else's opinion of what they should be, that they decided they were missing something. They forgot that He made them as-is so they could relate effectively with Him, others, and themselves. God loves to be needed, and when in right relations with Him, we love to need Him. But now it was all twisted.

So let's pause and think for a minute: Who told you that you were naked? Who told you that this "ideal" woman was actually ideal, and that you were inferior? Who told you that your awesome athletic skills weren't feminine enough? Who said that your work with the vulnerable was weak or less sophisticated than a job on Wall Street? Who said that to make it at your workplace, you needed to "toughen up" instead of having a soft heart for hearing people out? Was it the One who took the very fibers of His own heart and molded yours? Nope! Then, why does it matter?

So how is this confusion fixed? How do we come away from the lie and delight in who we are made to be? It all starts with a beautiful God who gave you a precious gift. You learn to believe Him again. You realize that the manipulators of the world do not love you. No. Your boss who flatteringly strokes your ego so he/she can use you is lying. That guy who tells you how wonderful you are yet doesn't listen when you speak your mind is also lying. The media outlets that say an undignified outfit or hairstyle would suit the dignified woman you are is only trying to get your money. 

But there is one who is not lying. He whispers to you, see. He tells you that you actually do not have to be hardened to protect yourself. You can come and trust Him. Tell Him your hurts and He will gladly listen. He even sees all your sin. The stuff you did long ago that you hide for fear of abandonment. He sees it. But unlike the world that wants you to keep your baggage covered so they don't have to break out of their narcissistic bubbles, He is moved with compassion by your weakness. Like when you see a child or a small animal in danger and you just want to rescue. He sees the one He remembers knitting together when no one else knew yet that you would be born. He created you excitedly, with great plans! Oh, He couldn't wait for people to meet His darling You!

He beckons you to be just who you are! He will make all of your crooked places straight. He forgives, He brings justice, and He rights wrongs (not always immediately, but patiently so that all parties find redemption. In the mean time, He will hold your heart safe in His own.). Will you believe He longs for you each day? Will you believe He made a way for you to come to Him and let Him be your Father and your everything? If saying yes seems like a long shot, I have been there and understand. Ask Him to help, and He will!

You are already the ideal you, so enjoy exploring that. You will not be disappointed! JOY!